Dr. Frey's Opinion

I didn't feel comfortable letting Lunagirl out of my sight after that incident, so against her wishes I kept her inside. She begged me with her adorable meows to let her back, but I knew, just knew, that the second time that thing wouldn't be lenient.

I scheduled an appointment with Dr. Frey and asked for a meeting as soon as possible. He had an opening on the following Wednesday, and so I went. In place of a bowl of cherries there was a small tray of cute colored macarons. I helped myself to, well, all of them (much to my shame; other people would have wanted those) as I waited.

The door to his office gently opened and he beckoned me inside. I practically bowled him over to get to the chair. Dr. Frey said, "Elizabeth, good Lord...what's the matter?"

I settled into the chair, gripping the smooth arms as I worded myself as best I could. Would he, too, think that I was nuts? I had to give it a shot, and I did.

He let me speak, listening intently the entire time and wrote down notes. When I had finished, he took off his glasses, folded them neatly and looked at me, "Elizabeth, listen to me. When you saw this Fear Dubh in that blizzard, you were cold, shaking, the snow obstructing your vision."

"But I know what I saw, Doctor," I pleaded, "it tried to go after my Luna! It's real. Please, please believe me. This thing is real and it killed Catherine."

Dr. Frey frowned, then sat back in his chair and nodded, "I don't know what to say, Elizabeth. Either her illness is spreading or, most unlikely, this creature is real. But let's go back further. Before the blizzard, did you see it then?"

"No, I haven't. But I did get...listen to this. I woke up one morning in December to find that someone had ripped a page out of Catherine's diary and taped it to the front door."

That caught his attention. He leaned forward, "Come again?"

I, too, leaned in, "Someone found Catherine's diary, something she took with her, ripped out the page that detailed her proposing to me, and left it on the front door. I still have it."

"Then tell the police as soon as possible. Why didn't you tell them then?"

That was a good question, but a part of me had a reason: it was a piece of Catherine that I held near and dear to my heart, and by giving it to the police, I would have to give it up. Later that day I did tell the police about my finding, much to their displeasure. They admonished me about not telling them sooner, but days later came back to me and said they could find nothing of use from it. No fingerprints, no markings, nothing. It was as if it just teleported there from nothing.

The rest of the session was unremarkable. He penciled me in for another session soon, and this time he would do a simple test, a similar one he did with Catherine.

Gelid

The other day, when yet another snowstorm began to cover the ground, I heard Lunagirl shriek and hiss at something unseen. I've never heard her react that way, not even with other cats. I looked outside and saw her, with a white dusting on her black coat and ear in her little eyes. She meowed and ran off. I followed her immediately to try and calm her down.

The snow became heavier as I followed her and suddenly the fear I felt weeks ago returned. Even though I wanted to get back in the house, I knew I couldn't leave my cat behind, not in this weather, not when she needed help.

I suddenly felt a hot heaviness in my ribs and throat that knocked me to the ground. My head bowed and my hair falling around my face, three drops of blood fell from my nose onto the snow. Seconds later I coughed up more of the sticky substance.

My anxiety was choking me more than the blood was. I scrambled to my feet and called out for her, begging her to come back. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw it again.

Standing there. Watching me struggle against nature.

Fear Dubh was as real as the sky was blue. Catherine wasn't crazy.

I couldn't run, not in this cold and the snow preventing me. I sobbed a bit, looking over my shoulder once or twice to see it still there, still watching. As if it were waiting for something.

I found Lunagirl under a tree, shaking with cold and fear. I grabbed and held her tightly to my chest as more blood flowed from my nose.

"Leave her be," I hissed out. Lunagirl cried into my arm and I snarled at the thing. I must have been crazy, with the snow and the blood and everything happening. I just wanted to protect my little girl more than anything.

It kept standing there, and I coughed up more blood.

I walked back as fast as I could, more scared than I've ever been as I begged Catherine to guide me back to the house safely. She must have heard me, my darling, because I did indeed get back there. Lunagirl wriggled from my arms and ran to my room as I went to the nearest mirror.

The blood coated my mouth in a sick parody of lipstick. I washed it off, threw away my nightshirt and cried long and hard. Lunagirl was safe with me and she made a nest for herself on my bed.

I took a nap then, but even still I felt it watching.

Blinding

On January 21st, as most of you know, was the first true snowstorm of the year. It was also the day my girls and I returned to school. At first the snow came down slowly, then it became so thick you couldn't see anything. The college was let out early and we quickly headed to our cars.

I, unfortunately, had parked too far from the building and had to brave walking through the icy winds. Also unfortunately, I forgot my gloves.

I walked slowly, though the soft mounds of snow that covered the sidewalks and streets, tripping more than once and getting my knees wet. I put my hand out to cat myself if I fell again, and when I looked up I saw a strange, tall figure in the distance.

Whatever it was, I could not see it clearly; the snow in my teary eyes and in the howling wind made in almost impossible. Though I now felt watched and vulnerable, I kept walking towards my car. The figure did not move an inch.

The closer I got the more the dread increased. I slipped on a patch of ice and was cushioned by a large pile of snow that had accumulated. I looked at my hands and much to my horror, the flakes did not melt when they landed on my trembling flesh. The figure seemed to get closer.

I didn't wait for another second. I grabbed my backpack and ran as fast as I possibly could to my car. The whole way the snow got thicker, the winds got more vicious and I could have sworn the temperature dropped even more. I thought I was going to freeze to death.

I made it to my car, threw open the doors and turned the heat way, way up. Slowly but surly, my hands began to feel again and the snow that stuck to them so eagerly morphed back into cold water. I felt surrounded by something dark and deep, something that observed me.

It took me almost three hours to get back home, and all the while I knew I was being followed. I didn't need to look in my mirrors to know that it was there. Pulling into my driveway and exiting my car was difficult--I shuffled through the snow and looked all around for the thing. Nothing. Nothing at all.

Catherine wasn't insane.

The Diary Entry

May 20, 2010

I finally did it! I proposed to Elizabeth and she said yes! Florence can't call me a wuss anymore. I can't wait to see the look on her face. But she'll be so happy I proposed, everyone will be. Mom and Dad are thrilled. Dad nearly fainted! I'll let the fact sink in for a bit. I'm so happy that I saved up all that money for the ring, cheap as it was. I plan on taking on another shift; I want to give Elizabeth the best of everything. This is the start of a brand new life for us and I can't wait to live it.

New Year and a Gift

2014 is upon us, sooner than I thought. Every new year seems like it comes quicker than the last one. It's freaky how every future becomes the present, and how every present becomes the past. In a way it's almost maddening. I wore  purple in honor of Catherine and the year she would never see. I tried calling her parents to wish them a happy new year, but they didn't pick up. I feel bad for them and I miss them terribly. I hope 2014 is kind to them.

On Christmas day I found a folded up piece of paper with my name on it taped to the front door. I already got a sense of dread before I even opened it. I nearly choked on my own air when I saw what it was.

[edit: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8kILY6ZFFkk the video.]

Winter Blues

Vivian dragged me out to the mall a few days ago, saying that it was more than time to get into the Christmas spirit and. I was surprised to see the rest of the gang loitering in the Cold Stone Creamery.

None of this is easy on anyone, and I appreciated what they did. We hacked around, playing with the cosmetics, trying on the clothes, listening to the cheerful music. Hell, we even joked about going to see Santa. It never materialized due to the long as hell line, but watching the kids' eyes light up when they get to tell the big guy what they want was magic in and of itself.

I had forgotten to tell them about my dream, but at that moment it didn't matter. Nightmares had no place there.

Christmas will be strange, though. Catherine is never going to come through that door, smiling and in her best outfit, to spend the holiday together. The Moores have long since move away and I haven't heard from them in a while. I don't blame them, honestly. I most likely remind them of the life they could have had. I want to wish them a merry Christmas.

Please, I beg of everyone: don't take your loved ones for granted. I know you get those words probably all the time, because it's true. I would give anything to have my Catherine back.

So I want to wish everyone a Happy Christmahanakwanzikamas.

Wake the Dreamer

Last night I had a pretty intense dream. The kind that you honestly think is real and you can't believe it's happening.

I was in the forest, walking calmly along what could have passed for a path, if there wasn't so much brush in the way. However, I knew the entire time that something was following me, yet I kept walking as if nothing was wrong. I heard whispers from all around me, and this time I could make out what they were saying:

"Her?"

"Her."

"Yes."

"Embrace it."

"...across space and time..."

"Don't fear [???] happens is the will of [???]."

"...darkness, grime and gloom..."

"...come, let us..."

I began to feel like I was suffocating; the more I walked the more I felt like I should run. But dreams are dreams and they have laws you can't break. I raised my head and saw...people, hundreds of them, standing as if they were statues. I couldn't make out their expressions though I walked passed them easily.

But the moment I got passed more than a dozen I felt a burning cold hand grab my upper arm and drag me back. The still people began to move, their faces ugly and frightening as they descended upon me.

My heart jolted me awake and I spent the rest of the night awake. The back of my head tingled like someone was running their long fingers through the wrinkles of my brain.

What was that?